Ever get chewed out? Did the person have a point?Yes. Were they right? Yes.Did the delivery suck? Yes. This will probably take sometime to get over. That being said I am greatful for where I am at. I need to spend more time writing and less time talking on the internet, But having been really pretty lonely and isolated lately I really couldn't help it.
Anyway working on background for story, world building and such. And trying to type up the story digitally so I can edit it easier.

I haven't written in some time.

For that I appologize. Recently I nearly became homeless, which was not entirely my fault. But the important thing is to not get discouraged. My Bible study teacher said something pretty important which was that even if I ended up on the street and had to live at a shelter it's just for a season and I am not destined to stay there. The big thing is to not feel sorry for myself, God hasn't abandoned me or anything.
I leave you with a poem I scribbled while looking at the moon one night:



The moon rose up out of the east,
Here her cradled radience was crowned
By a mantle of stars.



Finito.

Discomfort.

I would say I know discomfort pretty well. I got behind on my rent recently and was asked to move. It wasn't entirely my fault but I really felt God's peace all over it. I sensed he wanted me to learn to live out on my own. Honestly without any family out here it was pretty hard. I really didn't learn anything about living out on my own from my parents by the time they became Christians I was so jaded from a childhood of living with Alcoholics that I was really in no mood to listen to my father's lecture about finances.
For almost a month now I have been looking for places on line in San Francisco and in Marin(Northern county above San Francisco) for a place to live. Unfortunately most people want $1,200 to $2000 to move in I have about $300 dollars. I had a house sitting gig that was a week in San Francisco which bought me some time but the second house sitting gig I was hoping for fell though. So I was out of a place and didn't have a place to go to. Fortunately someone from AA payed for a room for last night and tonight. And someone else from AA said he might have a short term appartment for rent.
God really has opened the doors for me but my patence and my emotional state has been at the snapping point a few times. Not everybody has been paticularly helpful or kind to me during this time. But I was able to not fall back in a state of, " Hey your a jerk your just like my parents, I'm not going to reach out to Christians or people from AA anymore." This guy was the way his was but that was his garbage and had nothing to do with my past. Yes it hurt really badly. I didn't snap back because he was helping me to a degree however I am not eager to go to him again when I am in trouble.
I am trying to lean on God more,it not easy. Especially when you are teetering on the edge of homelessness. I'm pretty overwhelmed and more than a tad dispondant. But drinking isn't an option and God is no less faithful because things look grim. I just try to move forward and trust him with the next thing I need to do.